goodbye

the joy of finishing

Today was possibly, probably, potentially my last teaching day in Istanbul. My contract has finished, I have fulfilled my part, although typically my school is pleading surprise at my end date...like it was completely unexpected, sprung upon them unawares. My end date has been known since the day I signed my contract and so this tussle over pay is disappointingly familiar. I remember feeling sad when my classes ended in Switzerland. I felt genuine sadness at saying goodbye and we had lovely, intimate last lessons. The love between my students and I was heartfelt and real, Today I listened to an adult student explain to me why it was OK that he yelled at his mother for losing his shirt and that was about as emotional as it got.
I love Istanbul but I hate teaching here. It is not all the students' fault.I had a genuinely sweet goodbye from my group class last night but in general the nature of my school here has been to throw you from one situation to another so you never really connect with anyone and I have hated this. And I have felt my passion as a teacher die more each passing month.

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So I finished my last class and went straight to my favorite old mans' pub where I ate cheese and drank raki and felt liberated somehow.